How to achieve goals by writing them down

How to achieve your goals by writing them down

Science suggests we’re 42% percent more likely to achieve our goals if we write them down in long-hand, share them with someone, and review them regularly. Forty-two percent seems an amazing figure, so it may well be worth trying these tips if you’re not in the habit of writing down what you hope to be, do or have within a certain timeframe.

Goals can be as varied as you like. But they usually fall into four major areas:

  • Health
  • Relationships and love
  • Vocation
  • Time, money and freedom.

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Birthday thoughts half-way through nineth decade

Birthday thoughts swirl on the eve of my eighty-fifth, the centre of my nineth decade. First, being eighty-five is much better than the alternative, as my dear Dad used to say in his later years. Second, it happened very quickly. My childhood sometimes seems like yesterday. And it’s only a few years ago that I reached a half-century. Then it felt as if my life opened up to new adventures. Third, I’m aware how few years may be left and how much ground there is yet to cover.

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Kitchen gadgets and minimalisation

kitchen gadgets and minimalisation

Kitchen gadgets, on the whole, don’t excite me. As someone trying to live peacefully as a minimalist, I find gadgets complicate my life. Sometimes, Luddite might best describe me and my life-style. My relationship with phone, laptop and earphones tests my patience.

But every now and then a hankering after something that other people have owned for years gets me. Occasionally I submit to whim. Then become the proud owner of a gadget I hadn’t previously known I wanted.

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Ten-year guarantees saga and reservations

Ten-year guarantees saga and reservations

Ten-year guarantees no longer interest me. Or at least nowhere as much as they once might have. My interests are different now. But twice in the past few days, goods have been offered with a TYG. That got me thinking about life as an octogentarian.

In ten years, I may no longer be interested in claiming new-for-old. It’s daunting to think that something with a guarantee that long may outlast me. I feel as if I need to proclaim my intention of living to 100, although I don’t care about a letter from King Charles III. That prospect isn’t highly motivating.

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Nature’s profusion of purple flowers

Nature's profusion of purple flowers

Nature’s profusion, in all its manifestations, should continue to surprise us. But if you’re like me, it’s all too easy to take such abundance for granted. Julia Cameron, author of The Artist’s Way, talks about the abundance of ideas available to each of us. This applies especially when we are open and engaged on a project. She says,

Looking at God’s creation, it is pretty clear that the creator itself did not know when to stop. There is not one pink flower, or even fifty pink flowers, but hundreds... no two alike.

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Spring blossom excels at Dwellingup

Spring blossom, Dwellingup

Spring blossom was the pick-me-up I needed. A broken tooth-crown and consequent gappy grin (still under repair). Falling on a busy street. A head wound and concussion. They’d taken their toll and left me grumpy and out-of-sorts.

A drive on Sunday morning to Dwellingup, about 100 kilometres from Perth, and I found myself in what felt like heaven. You can read more about the little town in my blog, ‘Dwellingup, an old timber town with new life’.

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Scary hours in the emergency department

Scary hours in ambulance

Scary hours spent in public hospital emergency departments seem to be the norm in Perth. We’ve been proud of our ‘world class hospital system’, but that description no longer holds.

People with experience in other states assure me this condition is widespread across Australia. Several people, including a child, have died recently while waiting for an ambulance or hospital treatment.

I’m one of the lucky people. My injury, in the scheme of things, was not devastating and I had good support and care.

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Domestic drama for old folk

Domestic Drama for Old Folk blog

Domestic drama has had its wicked way with John and me over the past month. While I like change and novelty, I also like to pick and choose what happens. Holidays. Outings. New people. I’d like to keep all serious drama on the pages of books, or on television. That way we wouldn’t have to deal with it.

The title of this post reminds me of the delightful documentary series on ABC TV. ‘Old People’s Home for 4-Year Olds‘ and ‘Old People’s Home for Teenagers‘ touch me deeply. They deal with lonely old people whose lives we see transformed by the introduction of children whom they do not know.

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The Silence of Water by Sharron Booth – a review

Cover, the Silence of Water

The Silence of Water by first-time author Sharron Booth is an historial novel set in Adelaide and Fremantle. It was short-listed for the 2020 City of Fremantle Hungerford Award. The story spans three generations of the family of a convict who arrived in Australia in 1861. Meticulously researched, the novel is based on the life of Edwin Salt, a one-time tailor, convicted of a heinous crime in England.

Complexity of The Silence of Water

The novel moves backwards and forwards in time between 1848 and 1907. Movement between England and Australia, Adelaide and Fremante, as well as a large number of interesting characters create a plot which tantalises the reader with its complexity.

At one point, I felt tempted to imitate a close friend who’d encountered a similarly complex novel (I forget which one). We belonged to fairly sophisticated bookclub. My friend confessed that she’d had to read that month’s book, ‘story-by-story’ or character-by-character. She then put the whole story together when she re-read the novel.

While at first I found the structure of The Silence of Water confusing, it soon made sense. Details of the lives of three generations are braided, adding to the plot, and this also added to my enjoyment.

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The plot

Agnes and George and their three children find themselves in chaos when asked to move from Adelaide where they are well-settled to Fremantle. Edwin Salt’s third wife, Annie, has summonsed Agnes to care for her father. Annie says she will no longer put up with the drunken behaviour of the eighty-year-old.

Changing location upsets everyone. In particular, Fan (Frances), the only daughter and oldest child of Agnes and George, seems to take the move especially hard. Over time, however, she bonds with her grandfather. They enjoy each other’s company. Fan is curious about Edwin’s life, and he discloses information about it. Snooping for even more secrets, the girl discovers that her grandfather’s first wife died in childbirth and that he murdered his second wife before marrying Annie.

author sharron booth

Characters

In The Silence of Watewr, Sharron Booth develops the main characters with sympathy and depth. One can feel the angst of the young Fan, uprooted from the place where her childhood has been spent beside the ocean which she loves.

One can almost understand the belief of Edwin Salt. He thinks, in spite of the evil he has done, he is a ‘good man’. This belief was supported by the penal system in England at the time. Because his wife drank alcohol and provoked him, the law considered this a mitigating circumstance. Although he murdered his wife, his conviction was changed from murder to manslaughter with the lesser penalty of transportation.

Here is one of many possible examples, of Sharron Booth’s ability to paint a character. It describes Agnes’s husband, George Johnson.

…George Johnson wasn’t so much born as hammered together with nails and rivets in the Sunderland shipyards. The teacher at the church school had sid he was missing ‘apptitude’, mostly because of his gubby face and the holes in his trousers, but in truth George was sharp as flint.

Themes

Serious themes written with empathy make this novel an important addition to writing about the life of colonial Australia, and especially of Western Australia. Well-researched history includes the difficulties of living in colonial Australia at the end of the nineteenth century. Poverty and hardship underly the lives of ordinary people, who struggle to get work. I thought it particularly poignant that for Agnes and George, her father Edwin became a ‘boarder’ in their home.

The lives of women and girls must have been particularly difficult, as they struggled to ‘make-do’ with the little they had. Alcoholism and family and domestic violence sit at the heart of the story.

There are echoes in this novel of the concept: ‘See what you made me do.’ This has been documented by Australian journalist Jess Hill in a book and television documentary series of the same name. The work of Jess Hill deals with the complexity of domestic violence which in Australia leads to the murder of around one woman a week. News reports often contain comments from neighbours and friends about the murderers, saying in essence, ‘He was a good bloke.’

Setting in The Silence of Water

I thoroughly enjoyed the settings in this novel, particularly descriptions of Fremantle which is a few kilometres from where I live. Fan and Agnes like to swim and the beaches of Western Australia and South Australia come to life with Booth’s descriptions. The beaches run through the novel like a signature tune, adding much to the texture of the novel.

Recommendations

Anyone who enjoys historical, and especially Australian historical fiction would welcome the addition of this book to their library.

Bookclub members will find much to discuss, including themes, writing style, plot and characters.

Teachers would find much of value to discuss with students, including plot, themes, characterisation, language and writing skills.

details, the silence of water

I recently reviewed Kate Grenville’s novel, A Room Made of Leaves, also about colonial Australia. You can access the article by clicking here.

This review is linked to the weekly challenge of my friends, SueW who blogs at nans.farm.net and her blogging partner, CG, who blogs at themainaisle It would be good if you’d check out their websites by clicking on the highlighs.

Copyright, Maureen Helen 2022
Writer Maureen Helen

Medications – make your own decisions, take control

Medications - choice and control

Everyone has the right to decide about their own healthcare, including what medications they take. But, all too often, the opinions of doctors and other health care professionals influence us heavily. We can take responsibility for making informed choices for our own care, taking into consideration the benefits and consequences of our actions.

As substitute decision-makers for other people, we are sometimes also required to make decisions on their behalf.

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How I turned into a zombie

In my early seventies, a general practitioner diagnosed mild hypertension (raised blood pressure). I agreed to medication. A year or so later, I moved house and entered a particularly stressful period in my life. I found another GP closer to where I lived.

Each visit to the new GP seemed to result in an increase in medications of different kinds. Because I was anxious to improve my health, and most importantly to feel better, I didn’t query the decisions he made. Stressors in my life increased, and I suffered from increasing anxiety, poor decision-making, dizziness and abdominal cramping.

I’d worked as an advocate for older people, completed a PhD and published a book a few years before. Out with my daughter one day, I found myself holding on to a fence, dizzy and unable to walk further. I felt unable even to talk about what was wrong.

My daughter took me to a physician, whose first question,

Who’s in charge here?‘ alarmed and shocked me.

My mother is very much in charge of her life,’ my daughter responded for me. ‘But she’s ill and I’m here to support her.’

An emergency admission to hospital and cessation of all medications followed. Within days, I again became my articulate, competent, decision-making self. A week later, on fewer drugs and very small doses, I went home a different person. All these years later, I take tiny quantities of prescribed medication, three times a week. The regime serves me well. I exercise and eat well and remain fit and healthy

Since I discovered that chronic pain almost always occurs in response to childhood trauma and current stress, I rarely take even paracetamol. You can read more about that in my article, ‘Brain plasticity, new science and chronic pain.’

I’m careful, if not wary, of taking medical advice without proper consideration, and sometimes a second opinion. I’ve also become a passionate advocate for informed choices around health care.

All medications can be harmful

Of course, all medications have benefits and can improve our health and well-being. Some can be life-saving. Conversely, all medications have the potential to cause harm, especially for older people.

  • They can have multiple, sometimes serious side effects.
  • The danger can increase with dosage. A medication often has several names, and if more than one prescriber or pharmacy is involved, multiple doses can be taken by unwary patients.
  • There can be unwanted interactions between drugs.
  • They can impact on one’s day-to-day life because they cause drowsiness or dizziness.
  • Medications can cause older people to fall and injure themselves, often seriously.
  • Sometimes medications change thoughts or behaviour (eg. psychotrophics). These are occasionally used as chemical restraints in aged care facilities to control aggressive behaviour.

Questions to ask to be well-informed about medications

We have every right to ask questions about any medications suggested or prescribed for us. If the prescriber seems reluctant to answer questions, everyone in Australia can change their doctor. My blog, ‘Doctor shopping to combat ageism’ talks more about this.

The following list of questions to ask your health professionals. It comes from the pamphlet, ‘Medication: It’s Your Choice’ from the Older People’s Advocacy Network.

  • What am I taking?
  • How should it help me?
  • Please explain the side effects?
  • What could happen if I don’t take it?
  • What alternatives exist (including non-medication alternatives)?
  • When will my medications be reviewed?

How else can you make sound decisions about drugs

These sources may be helpful in the decision-making process.

  • Your prescribing doctor should provide full information.
  • You can ask for a second opinion or a specialist review.
  • Pharmacists provide sound information and advice about the medications they dispense.
  • If you or your loved one lives in an aged care facility or receives clinical home care, you can ask for a formal review of your medications.
  • The member agencies of the Older Persons Advocacy Network provide free independent support. Contact details below.

Disclaimer

This article has not been medically reviewed. For more detailed information about rights and responsibilities for older people in Australia you can contact the Older Person’s Advocacy Network on 1800 700 600. As well, each of the States and Territories has its own older persons’ advocacy agency.

In Western Australia Advocare Inc provides advocacy and support. I’m proud to have been the first Chief Executive of Advocare, which started 25 years ago. Their phone number is 1800 655 566.

Copyright, Maureen Helen 2022
photo Maureen-Helen

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