Frailty, or weakness in health or body, is often linked with old age, as if they define each other. I wonder if it can be overcome by a change of mindset?
Older people are diagnosed as being frail if they have a reduced grip strength, slower walking speed which can be self-reported or measured, and adverse responses to simple questionnaires.
Symptoms of frailty
Below is a list of some of the symptoms that a frail person may experience:
- Unexplained weight loss (around five kilograms in a year)
- Frequent falls
- Poor balance
- Decreased physical activity
- Loss of interest in activities that were once enjoyed
- Social isolation
- Fluctuating disability
My experience
Last year, I spent almost four weeks in hospital. I’d experienced some intermitent heart rhythm problems over a few years. Attendances at a hospital emergency department had failed to provide a proper diagnosis. In fact, one medico said I experienced ‘panic attacks’. That diagnosis seemed to stick.
Of course I panicked! My death seemed imminent in the grip of the paroxysmal fluttering and thumping of my heart.
Finally, a skilful cardiologist and some diagnostic tests showed my heart had sick sinus syndrome. According to John HopkinsUniversity School of Medicine, this is ‘a disease in which the heart’s natural pacemaker located in the upper right heart chamber (right atrium) becomes damaged and is no longer able to generate normal heartbeats at the normal rate’. A pacemaker and new medication later and the hospital discharged me.
My frailty
Sadly, four weeks almost continuously in hospital caused my body to rebel. I felt so wretched, attached to heart monitors and scared, that I rarely even got out of bed. Walking seemed too hard and anyway the blue hospital gowns I wore hardly felt like walking gear, even around a hospital ward.
My muscles deteriorated with lack of use and I felt weak. My arthritic joints became uncooperative. The new medication caused me to feel lightheaded and I fell several times. I’d lost a few kilos.
I felt generally very sorry for myself and wondered if and how I’d cope. It seemed I had no agency and no say in my condition.
I’d become quite frail, on any measure.
Time for decisions
My mind, although not exactly as it had been pre-illness, took me in hand. Time for some decisions, and not a moment too early. Frailty as a way of life didn’t excite me. I Perhaps my frailty depended on a change of mindset. Although I might never regain my former strength and joie de vivre, I could at least make some changes.
- I started walking in the nearby park most days with my wheeled walker.
- Sometimes I swam, not as far as previously. Then a dog bite while playing with the exuberant puppy who spends some of her time with me put an end to swimming.
- My diet began to include much more protein in an effort to increase my muscle health.
- With the help of a book, Miriam Nelson’s Strong Women, Strong Bones, an old favourite, I began to lift weights and practice balance exercises.
- I dusted off my blog, and posted most weeks.
- An online intensive writing course, ‘For the Joy and the Sorrow’ challenged me.
Soon, the changes in my routine began to pay off. I’m not exactly athletic, but I do walk faster and can mostly open jars and use my nine-litre watering can to water the plants on my balcony.
Mindset and frailty
For many people, frailty may be permanent. But it seems that for me, at any rate, a change of mindset has helped to reverse the frailty I experiences as the result of a health scare.
The draft of this blog was on my computer when my son, Timothy O’Callaghan, died at Christmas. It was a blessing I’d made the decision to change my frail state because his death would have caused even further deterioration to my mental and physical state.
Subscriptions
If you would like to be notified of new posts on this site, please go to the very end of this, and mark the last box.
Have made mostly similar decisions to assist my advance from a recent physical ‘obstacle’ – exercises, walking a bit more (with assistance from my walker), diet, etc. etc.
Thanks for sharing dear friend – always love knowing you and I are on similar paths even though they may be very different to the outside – but it is the inside where we are closely knit.
Love your willingness to share your posts.
Glad to hear about your similar decisions to improve your health and image, Elild zabeth B. Would love to hear what else you are doing. It’s always a pleasure to post a blog – keeps me thinking, writing and sharing. xx
You are an inspiration and role model, dear Maureen! I hope my mindset and body serve me as favourably as I “catch up” with you! ( Yes, I know, that’s logically impossible!!)
I’m so glad you’re getting out and about again. And I’m enjoying For the Joy’s and the Sorrows writing intensive. It’s quite a challenge! I’m looking forward to catching up with you in person. 💖
Thank you, Susan. Yes, it would be a big stretch to cover the age difference between us. It’s good to be out and about, and slowly doing new things. I read with amazement your plan to do 70 things this year with your husband. What a challenge you’ve set yourselves. I’ll never catch up with that, although I do have a couple of trips (in planes) in sight for this year. Feels like twenty years since I last went any where out side Western Australia. And I’m looking forward to seeing you, also. xx
Walking has been your “meditation” for so much of your life…. And party-park is such a lovely place to be. Strength can come in many forms 😘
I really hope you can come for a visit to Karratha, when the weather cools a little.
Yes, Claire, walking is sooo important to me, and I feel bereft if I can’t do it. Of course I’m coming to Karratha! Looking forward to it so much. Mxx
Hi Maureen
It’s great to hear about how, last year, you picked yourself up from a long hospital stay. It’s also good to know that your body is now stronger than it would have been if you had not taken that action. Well-done for that action which has put you in a better place to move forward in a physical sense, since the loss of your dear son Timothy just near Christmas. My heart has been with you, Maureen and it’s great that you have kept up your writing too. We all continue to learn from you Maureen, through your writing, we and can be inspired by your courage and resilience. Your writing always inspires me. Keep it up Maureen – with great admiration, smiles and love to you and yours,
Tricia
Keep on, keeping on Maureen.
Your writing is keeping your mental health & your physical health well & active.
Your son’s spirit is with you🙏🏼😘😘
Thank you Nena. I’m not sure what else people like us can do, except to keep on keeping on! And yes, Tim’s spirit lives on, even as I am so sad to have lost my friend and son. Mxx
Sad but lovely to read this, Maureen. Your frankness, courage and life force are an inspiration.
Hamlet said, of his mother Gertrude, ‘frailty, thy name is woman’. This was, of course, pejorative and misogynist. Though Hamlet is a complex character and one I loved and studied when I was at uni. But in your world, frailty is a condition that can be lived with and managed, even lessened, by mental and physical discipline and self-awareness. You have survived many challenges and turned them into growth experiences. Blessings and good health.
Dear Christina, Thank you for your kind comments about my writing and my attempts to live life to the fullest, as of course I know you also do. I so value our friendship over the years and so many miles that separate us. Love, Maureen
Hi Maureen – I met you today in Myer, and despite the circumstances, I’m very glad it led me to you and your brilliant blog. You’re really living the secret to positive aging. As I mentioned, I’m an occupational therapist in older adult mental health, and I’m definitely going to recommend your blog to all our clients. I’ll save my details below so I can email the photos from today. Take care! Em
Hello, Emily. I was delighted to open my blog today (after a week of not doing very much) and find your comment. I am happy to be able to thank you for all kindness you showed me after I fell in Myer on Australia day, and for the care you and your friend (Social Worker) and your partners provided. I am very grateful to all of you. Can you please tell your friend that I am grateful for her support and for sacrificing the green gauze baby wrap to staunch my bleeding head. I ended up with ten staples in my wounds at Hollywood Private Hospital ED and am recovered.
Thank you for your kind comments about my blog.I love writing it and of course enjoy it when I have a new reader. Thank you again.
Maureen Helen
My Dear Maureen,
Thank you for another excellent post.
Not for the first time, I marvel at your positivity. You put me to shame.
My 78th birthday was at the end of January. I woke on the morning feeling tearful and miserable. I began writing here, but instead, I’ve written an email to you.
Lovely to hear from you, Sue. I’ll check my mail.
This is my first time access to your Blog. Emily recommended your site to me. I note there not a lot (or any) male names in the blog group so far. If that is intentional then I am OK about not posting, although I would like permission to “follow the blog”
Hello, Doug. It’s lovely to have new readers, and you are very welcome to follow my blog. I’m not sure why I have so few male followers, but I think it may be because the men who do follow me are married to my friends. Maybe I need to think more about whether I’m writing about topics men enjoy reading about. I’m grateful to Emily who as you have probably heard and read looked after in Myer when I needed first aid and reassurance, which she and Rose and their partners provided so kindly and abundantly. I and