Eat dessert first in these uncertain times. It’s an old habit, but one I’d almost forgotten. I still choose dessert from a menu before looking at the entrees and mains. But somehow I’ve lost sight of the importance of grasping pleasure when it presents itself. But now I’m back on track.
This year, it’s a phrase: ‘Eat dessert first,’ which seems much more fun. I quickly discounted, ‘The year of travel,’ or ‘The year of excitement,’ which a friend suggested yesterday. Those won’t work for me.
The ‘Eat dessert first’ fridge magnet
Once there was a fridge magnet in my house. It read, ‘Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first.’
My older grandchildren greatly admired that magnet. Handled often, it soon lost its shine. Dull, it still read the same way. Frequently taken from the fridge, admired and laughed over, eventually even the words disappeared.
But it stayed on the fridge. We all knew what it had once said. It became a symbol of Maureen’s decadence, at least in the eyes of my grandchildren, even when we could no longer discern the words.
Phrase of the year 2023
This year, as you may have read in my recent blog, I plan to enjoy life more, to suck pleasure from it where I can. This year, I’ll do fewer things out of duty, more for fun,
I’ll smile more and take more deep breaths. Smiling and breathing both feel good and they are so easy.
I’ll take time to enjoy the sensations of the sun on my skin, a breeze in my hair, the bouyancy and freedom of water when I shower or swim. I’ll watch and read more comedy, and do them first, before the more serious occupations.
These all echo the sentiment, eat dessert first.
I plan to care less about what people think of me or what I do. To care less about what they say. To escape uncomfortable conversations and to make choices to act in my own best interests rather than to ‘people please’ because that’s how I’m wired. I’ll spend less time with those with axes to grind.
There’ll be subjects of conversation that will be taboo. ‘Pain’ and ‘discomfort’ will not cross my lips. As Gordon Livingston MD says in his book, Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart, ‘The problems of the elderly are often serious’. I’d add, ‘And frequently boring’. Let’s not go there!
Maybe I won’t say it, but I’ll think, ‘I don’t care’ more often. I’ll try not to care about things that don’t matter. Which doesn’t mean I won’t care for my husband for whom I am a major support. And of course I’ll continue to care for and about other people and important things.
This year, I’ll say more of what I think and make more rules about what I want, need and desire.
And I’ll take better care of my boundaries, too, as I eat more dessert.